Lion Tales


December 1, 2017

  Español Inglés #1. En una agencia de empleo: -¿Nivel de inglés? - Alto - Bien. Traduzca "fiesta".   - Party - Perfecto. Úselo en una frase. - Ayer me “party”...

SATIRE: Over 400 Cases of “Senioritis” at Lincoln?

William Quevedo sleeps through class (Jordan Summers/Lion Tales)
April 1, 2016

Senioritis What is this mysterious medical disease called senioritis?  Senioritis hits many high school and college seniors in their final semester or even their final year. College apps have been...

[Satire] SJUSD to Introduce 50 new Standardized Tests

Like this student, kids often agonize over all the standardized tests they are required to take.
March 17, 2016

The San Jose Unified School District announced today in a public statement that they plan to introduce 50 new standardized tests for all high school grades. "We're looking to improve our students' ability...

SATIRE: Unique Valentine’s Gifts

Basic Gifts Lead to Broken Hearts (Lincoln Lion Tales/Melissa Blasquez)
February 12, 2016

Do you ever want to go out of the box, away from the cookie cutter idea of, “Flowers, chocolates and big teddy bears” for your valentine? Here are some idea’s to help inspire you to stray away and...

SATIRE: Students Won’t Leave Campus

Ron Demetriades Hating Winter Break (Lincoln Lion Tales/Melissa Blasquez)
December 18, 2015

This winter break, here at Lincoln, teachers and staff encourage students to lay back, relax, and forget about all their responsibilities for the whole break. Of course, many students brush this idea off,...

SATIRE: 5 Steps to Survive Finals Week

Trini Sanches procrastinates by using Twitter instead of studying. (Jordan Summers/Lion Tales)
December 11, 2015

1. Burn all your books To go into your finals with the right mindset you need to clear your head of thoughts and knowledge. By burning your books you are burning the bad luck these books with information...

Students who Attend School on Monday to be Forced to Attend “Holiday School”

You could say the whole concept is... BANANAS
(Stock Lincoln Lion tales Photos)
September 4, 2015

As a rising amount of students who are oblivious to statutory holidays show up to school on off days, especially at Lincoln, our school's faculty have decided to create "Holiday School" as punishment. Holiday...

5 Rejected Spirit Week Ideas

In true student enthusiasm, we found a truly unspirited spirit week poster to kick off this list.
These ideas were "spirited away" before they came to fruition.
August 31, 2015

In honor of Lincoln's first spirit week of the year, we decided to share some of the less popular spirit day ideas. #1: Dress like your Teacher day. Though recommended by the staff, this spirit week...

Trump Announces Presidential Campaign a “Joke”

Donald Trump, pictured, laughing. This image was used on the internet for memes and other hilarious means.
August 20, 2015

On Monday, August 17th of 2015, Donald Trump, billionaire real estate developer, announced his ongoing presidential campaign a, "joke". "I just wanted to see how far I could get" said Trump, "I mean,...

“Sharing is Caring”

Students enjoy lunch for 30 minutes every day.  Rats on campus have the rest of the day to clean up after them.
January 20, 2015

Why Satire is Important in Today’s Newspaper Culture

This cartoon can be found in a historical issue of Lincoln Lion Tales.
January 16, 2015

Recent events have shown the impact satire can have. The French newspaper “Charlie Hebdo” was attacked by Islamic terrorists, because it had published comics about the Prophet Mohammed. These comics...

Senior Graduation Rehearsal Actually to Take Place at Nightime, Tailgate Party to be Longest Ever

Entire school unsure of results.
June 2, 2014
"Are you sure it's not a typo?"
Load more stories
Bilingual Student Newspaper of Abraham Lincoln High School, San Jose California.